Handling Moody & Irritated People (Overcoming Irritability Part 2)

So, in a previous blog post I shared with you how the Lord helped me recognize and overcome my irritability of others, and how it all started with loving myself. But how do I respond to others who are moody and irritated by me or others? Well...here are some thoughts.

Once I understood how my irritability stemmed from a lack of love for myself, then I was able to have grace and mercy for irritated and moody people. I began to have more of an understanding for them, instead of getting offended at them. When someone around me seemed chronically irritated or moody, my heart was moved with compassion towards them, because I recognized the root of their moodiness: self-hatred. (Read more about this in Need Help Overcoming Irritability). My reaction changed from offense to love. I began to pray that they would experience the love of God for them and learn to love themselves and see themselves how God sees them. Once you see yourself how God sees you, and you learn to love yourself, you can love others. I found the best way to help moody/irritated people, is to model the love of God and help them experience the love of God through you for them. In order to do that, you have to connect with the source of love and receive God's great love for you!

"See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him" 

(1 John 3:1). 

2 in 1-The Problem & The Solution

WOW...Challenged today by this. Have you ever heard the phrase, "So goes the church, goes the culture?"

Read Hosea 4:9...
'"And what the priests do, the people also do.' So now I will punish both priests and people for their wicked deeds."

I remember Sean Smith saying when he thinks about the challenges of his city and nation, he knows both the answer and the problem stare at him in the mirror.

1 Chronicles 7:14 doesn't say if the WORLD will humble themselves and pray and turn from their wicked ways then God will heal the land...it says if the people of God will humble themselves and pray and turn from their wicked ways. The responsibility is on us as believers. As a believer I feel a personal responsibility when I hear about someone committing suicide in my state. It doesn't matter if I never met them, or knew them. I feel a responsibility as a Christ follower, who has been entrusted with the power of the Holy Spirit to see spiritual strongholds like hopelessness and depression demolished, to declare freedom and see captives set free! We have that power as believers--but it takes us to believe that and operate in the authority Christ has given us.

I have heard many examples of how revival and transformation came as a result of a handful of praying people who set themselves apart to seek the Lord. I want to be so sensitive to the Holy Spirit that when someone's life is in the balance, He can trust me to answer the call to pray and intercede for His intervention. I know it doesn't depend all on one person, but it depends on the Body of Christ as a whole--but the whole is made up of individual parts, who all have a part to play. But too often we alleviate ourselves of the responsibilty. What if EVERY believer began to take suicide and the souls of people personally? What if we began to pray like the eternal souls of this generation depended on us? What would that look like? And what would happen with that kind of urgency and action? What if when you see a precious person bound in addiction, instead of looking the other way, you looked at yourself, as both the problem and the solution.

Need Help Overcoming Irritability?

Do petty things irritate you? Do people irritate you and you don't know why, because in your mind, you know they are actually pretty amazing people? Do you ever wonder what is wrong with you? Do you ever condemn yourself for the lack of love you display at times? If so, I can relate. There is hope. 

Recently I found myself moody and easily irritated by the smallest things. Loud noises, simple questions, mumbling, incorrect speech, and other inconsequential things. After a few days of being in this mode, and condemning myself for the lack of love I exhibited towards others, the Lord broke in and reminded me of this verse in Mark 12:30-31:

 "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

The part 'Love your neighbor AS yourself' struck me. We love others as we love ourselves. It has been said, we can't give out what we do not have. We can't love others if we don't love ourselves. Simple, but deep, as my friend Maria says. If I am having a hard time loving others because I am irritated with their behavior, then in reality, I am having a hard time loving myself, and the person I am really irritated with is me. 

As I honestly examined my love for myself, I began to see how I had been irritated with myself. I had been unhappy with my behavior. My self-hatred sounded like this, "I don't pray enough." "I don't wake up when I want to." "I don't read enough." "I should do a better job." I don't, I don't I don't. My unhappiness with me was spilling over in my attitude and actions to others. What I needed was a fresh dose of God's for me. What I realized is, it's ok to be unhappy with areas of your life that need changing, but bring those areas to the Lord with confession and repentance, then lean on His grace to change you. Extend that grace to yourself. If you do something you don't like, deal with it in light of the cross of Jesus. Then forgive yourself. As you receive God's love for you, you will find that loving others comes more natural. After all, "We love because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19).

Just a passing thought about entertainment

If Jesus lived here in our day, what, if any, entertainment would he approve of?

I wonder. Sometimes, when deciding if I am ok with submitting myself to a movie or program, I find myself asking, "would so and so approve?" or, "I saw them watch this, so it must be ok." What if instead of asking if people who we deem holier than us approve of something, we ask ourselves, what would Jesus think of this?

Another thought about that...

Submit yourself. When you sit under the influence of something, you are submitting yourself to it. You are opening yourself up to the messages broadcasted in what you are viewing. Are you ok with that?  ask myself, what is this movie teaching through the lives of these characters? Are they displaying actions and attitudes contrary to that of Christ, and if so, is this presented as good and desirable? If that answer is yes, how is this affecting our lives and distorting our views? 

Romans 12:1 instructs us,  "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."
Notice what happens AFTER we allow our minds to be renewed. We are ABLE (possess the ability) to TEST AND APPROVE WHAT God's will is. Not just His permissive will, but HIS GOOD, PLEASING and PERFECT WILL! Makes you wonder, if we DON'T transform our minds, THEN HOW is our ability to TEST and APPROVE the will of God hindered? That is not something I want to find out!  

Women's Retreat Prep

So...I am in Anchorage this week for a women's retreat that I was invited to speak a session at. The theme of the retreat is "Beauty redefined," which is so awesome because God totally orchestrated a jewelry line that I will be released exclusively for these ladies, called "Beauty redefined." I was praying about what I can give the ladies to go along with the message. Then one morning, God dropped this idea into my mind...check it out! I am super excited for this!

http://youtu.be/yS4oUyv5aCQ

REMEMBER

So, I have been told, that God has given me a good memory. I can remember names, sermons, encouraging words...but not just good things. If I am not careful, and watching my heart, I can really remember offenses and instances of where I have been hurt, and I have had to learn to LET GO! Anyway, so, I was thinking about the memory thing. Lord, if every good and perfect gift comes from above, (James 1:17) then what is this gift of a good memory for? God gives gifts to edify the Body of Christ. Then I got to thinking, why did God give us a memory in the first place? Because memory, is tied to RELATIONSHIP. Think about it...people who can't remember your name or who you are, don't have relationship or HISTORY with you. Or, you didn't make that much of an impact on their life for them to remember you. Think about the families who have a parent or grandparent suffering from Alzheimer's. How painful it is for the families not to be recognized by their loved one. All the points of reference for their relationship...gone. Suddenly dear loved ones, become suspicious strangers. How awful. Then I thought, how passionate our God is, to want RELATIONSHIP with US, that HE GAVE our brains the ABILITY to REMEMBER. He WANTS to have HISTORY with us. If we DIDN'T have the ability to remember, we would have NO HISTORY with people. No memory of shared experiences to build on. Often in hard times, it is a MEMORY of a word spoken, promise given, or dream, that gives us the STRENGTH to KEEP going. If we didn't have a memory, we would just be BLANK! Never able to accomplish anything, because without memory, you don't know what you are doing. You would never KNOW people. You would meet them, then forget. You would share an experience, and then it would be gone. Without memory, there is no RELATIONSHIP. How awesome and passionate for us, is our God that in His wisdom, He gave use the ability to REMEMBER HIM. To share experience with Hom, and not lose it. No wonder all throughout the Bible, God instructed the Israelites to REMEMBER HIM and what He had done! He charged them to SET UP MEMORIALS (Josh 4:1-8 one example) and FEASTS (Ex. 12, the Passover) to remember His deliverance and miracles, generations after. And just as I did this morning, Jesus instructed us TO REMEMBER HIM (I Corn. 11)through Communion. Remember what HE HAS DONE. Remember His promises. REMEMBER where He has brought you from! Even we make effort to preserve memories, with scrapbooks, photo albums, journals, home videos, etc. Why? Because memories = experiences with loved ones, or important lessons that if we forget, it could be detrimental to us. So, thank you LORD for our memories!

Everyday musing: ONE in the SAME

The word integrity, as we know, comes from the word INTEGER...which in math we learned means WHOLE..whole numbers. ONE. No fractions. Intergrity: being whole and undivided. So, for us to have integrity, we are to BE ONE-our words and actions are to be ONE. Not two different things. What we say, is what we do, and what we do is what we say. They aren't two DIFFERENT things. Lord, let my words be my actions, and my actions be my words.